Bob and Annette Wallace know how quickly a marriage can fall apart. Annette was married once before, Bob twice. During the early years of their marriage, they questioned whether this marriage would make it either.
“For about two years, it was anything but blissful,” Bob said. “It was still a coin toss as to whether our marriage would survive.”
Tension between Annette and Bob’s teenage daughter had put tremendous strain on the new marriage. “The first year we were married, I left him several times,” Annette said, “I walked out. I couldn’t do it...But I knew that I loved him.”
Over the years, their marriage grew stronger. But a series of live-in family members—ailing parents, teenagers and grandchildren—introduced challenges to the relationship.
“After my dad died, my mom’s health started failing and she had to come live with us,” Bob said, “She would become very hostile towards Annette...I could do no wrong, and Annette could do no right.”
The knowledge of how easily a marriage can unravel makes the Wallaces all the more disciplined in protecting their own. They work hard at their marriage and pass on the lessons they have learned to others as marriage workshop leaders.
Since 2004, Bob and Annette have regularly delivered workshops on behalf of the Oklahoma Marriage Initiative.
“What we have learned through the OMI has been a miracle in our own marriage, and to be given the opportunity to teach and share our experiences with other couples is an ongoing blessing,” said Annette. “But what’s remarkable is how being workshop leaders helps us to be mindful of how we can keep our marriage strong.”
Bob and Annette wish they’d known years ago the things that they know now. It could have spared them tremendous heartache. “We learned through hook or crook, by trial and error,” Bob said. But they’ve learned.
And their commitment to their marriage—fueled by their shared faith and values—has propelled them through difficult times and into a rich and rewarding partnership.